The English Pub and the art of adult conversation
We got back to the village just in time for the pub to fire up the kitchen and the hearth. The fish and chips came with the ever notorious minted mashed peas. I kind of enjoyed it. Kinda.
While we enjoyed our food we talked to Symone about the fine art of conversational tennis, and how to get better at it. She has been trying hard to participate in conversations in an adult way and find her conversational groove but of course it’s a clunky process. I remember being this age and just never feeling like I was finding the right balance of listen and talk.
Today’s lesson was: 1. Know your audience, and 2. If the joke didn’t hit the first time, it’s really not going to work to repeat it…three more times.
She was open and interested and as the evening wore on we moved on to other topics like why people want to talk about the weather instead of what’s real, why anxiety and depression often go together, how to know when you are getting better at something, and what college is like.
Good stuff.
Tips for visiting pubs with teens:
Don’t avoid English pubs with your teens! Embrace!
For US teens a pub is a very new, and exciting, environment. It’s not like much of any kind of resturaunt they will have been to, and the social scene is an interesting blend of family oriented and bar.
The intimate setting, close quarters, and the friendly bustle will usually result in some great conversation with locals.
The drinking age for beer is 16 in England (accompanied by an adult, and ordered by an adult). Depending on your family culture, your visit to a pub may be an opportunity for your teen to try beer or cider legally. This WILL be a big deal to them, and if you have green-lighted the experience, try not to be a big drag. They will likely not like the taste, but will love feeling grown up and sophisticated. If you can keep it cool, it will be a light-touch opportunity to discuss the complexities of alcohol. And by keep it cool, I mean not sounding like an DARE commercial from the 80’s. There are lots and lots of negatives around teens drinking, but think about their first experience being with family, sanctioned, and in a culture that normalizes responsible drinking for teens. It will set a tone that they won’t forget and will turn down the volume on the draw of the ‘forbidden’ when they merge into the late teen party scene in the US.
Pubs often host trivia, music, comedy, readings, and sing-alongs. These homey events offer a great view into the lives of the locals and will create memories that will shine in your mind for years.
